An hour later I turned off the television
with heaviness in my heart. The woman on television found love on the
Internet. She was happily married for five years now. I couldn’t believe
it as I ate another cookie, playing with the white icing. If she found
love on the Internet then what was stopping me?
Of course a computer, but I had over ten
thousand dollars in the bank, so buying one wasn’t an issue. And there
were a million other avenues to establish with a computer. I’ll get AOL
and let my mind explore. I was so excited I could burst. This would
definitely elevate the boredom. With a computer I could shop, visit the
websites, play music; take on-line classes. I could have an array of
fun. Why didn’t I have a computer before now? No wonder I was bored.
A month later on another Friday night, I was sitting in my living room,
staring at my new computer, the renewal of my now exciting life. I was
invented with American On Line, and communicating through email, really
enjoying the rewards of what a computer could do for me.
But I was a little nervous about the
personals which I stared at everyday, but a frighten rabbit to click. I
was a pro with my computer, even paying my bills online. What an
incredible working machine. What was my hesitation in pursuing the
personals? Because I desperately wanted it to work. I was petite, and
beautiful, so if I couldn’t find a mate the normal way, I had to pursue
every avenue available to me. Without anymore undue hesitation, I
pointed the mouse to personals, on the AOL screen, and clicked.
With a click of a mouse, and few personal
questions, I was on my way to meeting men who shared the same goals as
mine. I was an administrative assistant, so a doctor, or an attorney
would be great, but I wasn’t choosy at all. Two hours later I emailed
ten men, and smiled to myself. There was no going back now.
Everyday I ran home from work to eagerly turn on my computer immediately
checking my email. All ten men replied back, so I wrote them, answering
their questions, communicating back and forth. Some men chatted with me
on the instant message screen, which was very convenient. Literally I
was like a kid on Christmas day, having the time of my life. Of course
the Internet wasn’t a sure avenue for happiness. Number 1, 2, and 3 were
white, and only wanted to discuss kinky sex; Number 4, also white, was
disable. He wanted a relationship attached to a pacemaker. I concluded
our chats altogether. Number 5 wanted to come visit me as soon as
possible, also white. I wasn’t blind to the fact that I could be
chatting with a maniac, so I had to trend on careful ground.
Number 6, also white, wanted a friend, which
wasn’t a problem, but I wanted to meet some black men. I had never dated
men of another race before. Where were the black men? I guess they
didn’t have time to communicate on the Internet. Number 7 just wanted a
friendship too, so we chatted every chance we got. Number 8 was married,
and wanted extra curricular activities, but I wasn’t the one. Number 9
asked me a few questions, and never wrote back.
Now I was on Number 10 determined to find my
mate. I had over 250 matches, so it was all-good. Number 10 called
himself, screen name, James123. My screen name was Lynda4. I wasn’t all
that creative at the moment. He seemed okay as I Instant messaged him to
find out if I should move on to Number 11.
After a few tries, with him not being
online, I played with the soap opera website, catching up on the latest
soaps. When I was reading the events on the Bold and the Beautiful, an
instant message screen interrupted me. It was James123. I instantly
“Hello. How are you? My name is James?”
“It’s nice to meet you, Lynda. How old are you?”
I was curious to know his race. “I’m thirty-eight, and yourself?”
“I’m forty and black.”
I smiled. “I’m black also,” as I eagerly typed. Finally!
“I’m searching for my soul mate.”
“Tell me about it.”
“I like books.”
So far so good. “I love books.”
“I’m divorced with no children.”
“None for me either.”
“Are you ready to tie the knot?”
“I am with the right person.”
“Me too. Did you like my photo?”
I forgot that Number 10 had one. “It’s very nice.”
“Where is yours?
I had one on a CD. “I can email it to you now.”
I went to work emailing the picture which only took five minutes. I then
stared at my computer screen, waiting for his response. Five minutes
later I saw his words and smiled. “You’re beautiful.”
“When can we take in a movie?”
“After we chat for a month.”
“Sounds good to me. I don’t want a desperate woman.”
I laughed. “Me either.” Maybe James would be the one. I hoped so.
A month later I was staring at my closet full of clothes. What should I
wear was the most important question? I was finally meeting James at the
Water Tower Place. This was it. We chatted every day, so now it was time
I had an image of him, but there was nothing
like the real thing. Finally I settled on a blue mini dress, casual, but
not whorish. I didn’t want to send James the wrong message. I styled my
short haircut, adding makeup and high heel blue pumps. I looked good on
this sunny day in mid-June. The weather couldn’t be any better as I
headed for my car. It was time.
At the Water Tower Place, which was absolutely beautiful, I gave myself
a tour because I was early, than usual. I found myself staring at every
man I saw, but I knew James, and we agreed to meet at McDonalds, a
neutral place. When it was six on the dot, I slowly strolled to
McDonalds. I had never been so nervous in my life.
The minute I walked in James greeted me. I smiled at the tall, beautiful
man reminding me of the basketball player, Grant Hill. They could be
twins. “Hi.” “You look fabulous. Now let’s go to a real restaurant.” He
was my kind of man.
Four hours later, almost midnight, I found myself staring at James, as
he helped me out of my car, parking his along side mine. “The evening
was nice,” I replied. “Best evening I had all year.” I actually wanted
to kiss him. What was wrong with me? It was only our first date. But the
way his eyes met mine, I could tell that he wanted to kiss me. Our eyes
literally held in a seductive stare.
Of course I had to break the spell because I
wasn’t about to kiss and tell on the first date. What would he think of
me if I let him into my home and we instantly made love? Frankly, I
didn’t give a damn because I wanted him more than ever, and I was going
to have him, but patience was the key.
“I should leave,” he replied. “I don’t want
to go, believe me. I want to walk into your place, and then make
passionate love to you. You take my breath away, but I know it’s only
our first date. We can’t rush into anything. I’m not a slut in a sense
either. You know what I mean.” I laughed. “I got the picture. You can
come in for some coffee, though. We both had a lot to drink, and I’d
hate for you to have an accident because you drank too much. The wine
“I can come in for a minute.” I knew I was
probably making a mistake, but I just didn’t want him to leave. Fifteen
minutes later we were sipping coffee, but our eyes were meeting on a
very dangerous level. I couldn’t control my libido. Something was
happening to me, and it had nothing to do with the hot coffee. I sat it
down on the table, because my hands were shaking. James noticed them,
and sat his down, and then he moved toward me, and then my lips were on
his, and the fire in my body lit up to a high temperature...
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